Friday, January 30, 2009

Secrets of my Soul

So I have discovered that I am not much for posting pictures on this. I get to frustrated then I think I will have time to do it later and give up altogether. Well I cannot believe that it is already 2009. Every day seems to just go by faster and faster, as the world around me just becomes busier and busier. It is kinda funny to me because of the business that I am in, it has been the slowest ever, at least since I have been doing it, and everybody still needs everything done yesterday. I have really been challenged to stop and just take in the moment. To take that extra minute to just look at the mountains or listen to the birds. Sometimes I feel like I am in a movie and I am moving in slow motion and everything around me is going 100 miles an hour.



Our time here is so short. I don't want to waste one moment. I don't want to live with regrets.



I really have been just taking so much in. I feel like such a sponge. God's word has become so real, so tangiable. I was reading in Ester, and that book said it best, For such a time is this. I realize that I don't want to waste any more time, living for me. I want to see the glory of GOD around me. I want to do his will where ever I am. I am seeking after him and he is filling my cup. His love is so perfect. He is love.



I feel like I am entering into a new chapter in my life, and I can't really see the title of the Chapter, but the last one left me haning onto every word, and I can't wait to turn the page to see what is next. I am kinda scraed, it might take me out of my comfort zone. I love Change, but it isn't always easy.



I have such deep desires. Longing. Things I want to go. I desire to me a mother, I long for it. I have never wanted somthing so much in my life. I was given such an amazing husband at such a young age. I feel so Blessed. I have so many great memories. He is my bestest friend. And we have overcome so much. We have faught for God to be the center of our marrage. The rock that we stand on and hold onto. I have come to a point in my life of surrender, surrender what I want most. And hold onto what I know, God's word. His love, and Truth. His will and purpose for my life is so much more than I could ever understand.



I pray that he will hold me. And carry me. Walk with me. I love the verse of song "take my heart and seal it". That is my prayer. I pray that I would stay in this moment forever. This moment of surrender, not my will be done but yours. So I wait and I pray.